THE last thing you'd expect from a motel with a name like 'Family Inn' is for it to be something like a love hotel.

On a trip to Phuket, a friend and I took a bus transfer from the airport to Patong Beach.

The bus stopped along the way at a travel agency to drop some passengers off. It was just as well as we didn't have pre-booked accommodation.

We picked one from several brochures. It was called 'Family Inn' which sounded innocuous enough to us.

Soon, we arrived at the motel, just one street away from the main thoroughfare on Patong.

We were early, and the room was not ready for us, so we waited in the small lobby/reception area.

Before long, two Caucasian men arrived and sat at the concierge's desk to book a day trip.

The manager asked them: 'Last night, everything okay in room?'

The men replied, 'Yes', then started whispering to each other.

We couldn't help but overhear the manager's next words

'You had girls in room last night?' he asked. 'We couldn't clean the bed sheets. Very bad. All blood. You have to pay. Our launderer could not clean it.'

We would have thought someone had been murdered in the room the night before - if not for the constant flow of local women through the motel's tiny lobby.

DUBIOUS GUESTS

Women streamed by in extremely short shorts and tiny tank tops.

When we finally got the key to our room at this 'Family Inn', we were happy to find that it was spacious.

But more importantly, it was clean - with no hint of blood on the sheets.

Still, as we shut the door, we noticed something strange about the latch.

It looked like it had once been a chain latch like those seen in older hotel rooms.

Except, on this one, the chain was missing.

Instead, there was a broken teaspoon handle inside where the chain was supposed to be.

You had to slide the teaspoon handle across to latch the door.

That set us off rolling on the floor with laughter.

We didn't know if we should be worried or amazed at the hotel management's ingenuity.

I guess if you're on a budget holiday, these things are to be expected.

We later moved to a tourist-class resort.

But, as it turned out, this 'Family Inn' was the cleanest place we had on that trip.